Thursday, March 17, 2011

Work in Progress!

I have officially had my CPAP machine for just over a week and I think last night might have finally been a successful nights sleep.   Justin laughed that I was in the exact same position when he left for work this morning as when I went to bed last night.  I'm never that still during the night so I'd say that was a huge success.  Each day has gotten easier to sleep with in the wind tunnel.  My REM meter plus only tried to drown me once and thankfully no repeat performances yet.  Last night I even was even able to sleep past 5 with my machine on.     My sleep study results were super interesting and showed that I actually spent very little time in REM sleep.  I think I'm finally sleeping well enough to move through all the levels of sleep because I woke up in the middle of the night from a crazy dream and ripped off my mask.  Good times!  I knew this wasn't going to be a success over night and I keep reminding myself of that by I'd really go for two nights sleep in a row.

I had a followup visit with the nutritionist  today.  I wasn't looking forward to this visit since I had enjoyed my birthday cupcakes, wine and so on but over all it was a good visit.  2 pounds down and considering how much I enjoyed my birthday treats I think that is a huge success. That's a total of 13.2 pounds on the nutritionists fancy dancy body scanner.  The best part was the progress I could see in the change from fat mass to muscle mass.  I've lost 20pounds of fat mass since Jan 27 and my BMI is down 2% as well.  I'm finding motivation in the fact that my pants are fitting better. 

I think I"m on the right track with improving my nutrition, exercise habits and sleep patterns.  I will admit that I'm totally impatient and I want all of it to be perfectly aligned and working ummmmmmm  yesterday!  Patience is not a virtue that comes easily to me.  Thats a work in progress too!

Thursday, March 10, 2011

Kicking off 35!

Yesterday was my 35th birthday and I enjoyed the heck out of it and plan to keep enjoying it clear thru the weekend and possible thru next weekend.  One just never knows how long this celebration will last.  I had lots of loves and hugs from my boys and if you've ever heard Riley say Happy Birthday you'll understand why it makes my heart smile too.  He loves birthdays and I'm pretty sure its because of the cake.  Can't blame him on that one.  Justin brought home red velvet cupcakes with cream cheese frosting and WOW they were yummy.  I didn't do so well with eating healthy yesterday but it was delicious and I don't feel one ounce of guilt.  Birthdays only come once a year and they need to be celebrated.  Our amazing babysitter helped Riley make me a card.  They used Riley's hand prints as the blooms on a field of flowers.  It was super cute waiting for me when i got home from work.  Riley and I have been arguing about the balloon today.  He is pretty sure it is his and doesn't believe me when I tell him its mine.  NO MOM Riley's BALLOON he tells me.  When I remind him he gave it to me for my birthday he looks at me and says NO Riley's. 

I remember back to high school when I was in the Miss Reardan pageant.  Insert giggle now.  I was the 2nd Princess in the Miss Reardan contest.  I'll dig out a picture of that sometime but really what I was thinking about was the interview portion of the evening when they asked me what I thought my life would be like in 10 or 15 years.  I don't remember my answer exactly but it was pretty generic about going to college and having a family and being an active member of my community.  (no world peace answers for me) While I've checked those items off my to do list life has become so much more.  I don't think I could have possibly ever imagined what my life truly would be and while it isn't glamorous I love it!

I certainly wouldn't have imagined picking up my very own CPAP machine the night before my 35th birthday.  I'm not completely sure I can imagine it now and I've done it.  Over the past month I've completed a sleep study and learned that I have fairly severe sleep apnea.  I guess I have to stop blaming the boys for me being exhausted all the time.  I am trying to get used to sleeping with what feels like a wind storm blowing up my nose.  The first day I woke up feeling like my nostrils were permanently flared.  I spent most of the day rubbing my nose and feeling a bit like a character in a movie that had just done a line of coke in the bathroom.   Last night I switched out the nose piece for the smaller pillows (I love that they call what I wear nasal pillows)  turned up the humidifier and things went a bit better.  Well until about 5am when I woke up with water in my nose.  I'm pretty sure my REM star Plus was trying to drown me in my sleep.  I'm hoping night three is the charm.  I could use a good nights sleep. 

35 is off to a good start and I plan to make it a good one.

Monday, March 7, 2011


I don't know about the rest of you but I needed a rainbow today.  It was another crazy day watching my friend's worlds spin out of control.  There is so much I simply can't control.  So, I need to focus on the things I can control.  Thank you to Amy for the reminder that I needed to update to a bit more positive of a post.  So with that little reminder  I needed to find the positive in the world around me.  

One really bright ray of sunshine in my world is Riley.  He truly is amazing.  After being sick it took him a bit to get back to his sassy little self but last week he was  BACK.  He had a great week at school and the twinkle in his eye was back.  Our fabulous babysitter Kristi took a few pictures of him working on his project at school.  I think you'll agree that he is budding artist.  I love the look of concentration on his face as he paints his rainbow.  PRICELESS!!!

Wednesday, March 2, 2011

Ramblings and randomess

My mother in law called this evening I think with the sole purpose of reminding me that it has been a full month since my last post.  She may be my sole remaining reader... I wouldn't know that since she never leaves a comment. In an effort to keep my family happy here is what Hurricane Riley and clan have been up to over the last month. 

I think I'll start with the infamous Hurricane Riley himself.  Riley has been battling a sinus thing for a while.  At the ten day marker of the second round of antibiotics he popped up with a fever and slipped in to neutral.  A couple trips to the Dr and a chest xray later we discovered he had pneumonia.  Apparently they are seeing lots of pneumonia this year that they can't actually hear at the clinic.  The kids present with the symptoms but the Dr can't hear the rattle though it is obvious on the xray.  Thankfully my pediatrician sent us for an xray and we started the right meds that same day.  Riley has been busy in school.  He is learning all his letters and sounds.  His teacher conference was super positive and his special education teacher says he is showing tons of kindergarten skills. 

Rex has been busy busy with school, Cub scouts, indoor soccer, basketball, preparing for his first communion and confirmation, and finding time to just be a boy and play.  He appears to love it all and we are getting ready to sign up for spring baseball which will be a new adventure in busy.  In the past we have played summer baseball so it didn't overlap with soccer but this year he decided that he wants to play with his friends at school.  He will be playing real Little League as long as I don't mess up and not get him registered on time or something.  I'm not sure how we will balance two sports with practise but it will be fun to watch him with his buddies so its worth it....right???  Rex is doing really well at school.  Teacher conferences this Friday so I'll get the scoop then but other than needing more class participation I don't think the teacher has any complaints. 

I have been a medical mess it feels.  Nothing truly serious just a lot of little dents and dings.  I'm having success with my life style eating changes.  I'm down 15 pounds with out much effort.  I have been feeling better than I have in a long time.  I assume that means I have stabilized my blood sugar but will find out for sure in April when I go back to the Dr for more blood work.

In addition to the PCOS I have discovered that I have sleep apnea.  I completed a sleep study a few weeks back and go back tomorrow for the second half.  I was so ramped up about the whole event that I couldn't calm down enough to sleep and therefore didn't meet the insurance requirements to have the cpap machine set up that same night.  So tomorrow evening, for my sleeping enjoyment, I get to go back to see my buddy the sleep technician.  At this point I'd rather see my pool boy named Juan but I'll have to settle for my technician buddy.  He has all my special wires and gooey sticky "hair gel" all ready for me.  I'll even get to pick out my very own Darth Vader style mask.  I'm so excited I can hardly contain it.  Justin thinks he is ready for me to have my machine so I'll stop twitching and snorting but I'm not sure he is ready for the sexy beast I'll transform into with my fancy new headgear. 

As I sit and type this I know it sounds like such a long list of whining.  Some days its so easy to throw a giant pity party but there are so many reminders that things could be so much worse.  A good friend of mine had a scare today that her daughter might have leukemia.  Thankfully the blood work came back normal but it does slow you down a bit and put things in perspective.  A dear friend of my is awaiting test results that really at this point I'm hoping what ever she has just isn't life threatening.  Seriously is that the best prayer I can come up with?  My uncle is fighting for his life and losing to cancer. I am very thankful that he has an amazing faith and I know he and the family will find comfort in prayer.  It is so very difficult to see your family and friends struggle at every turn.  Some days it simply feels like too much.  I know in my heart that God truly does have a plan for each of us and we must trust him to show us the way, but it is still so hard.  So over the last month that I've been living my life I have been trying to remind myself that I have a beautifully wonderful life and family and friends that I need to thank God for every single day. 

As your reward for making it through that long winded ramble here is a family photo from the fall of 2007.  Riley is not quite 1 year old and Rex had just turned 5.